Thursday, February 16, 2012

I have a question?....

What would you do or better yet think, if you turned on your computer in the morning, opened your email and found this from one of your sisters?  She also sent it to our oldest sister at her work place email!

"Hello:  Can’t find Melinda’s email address for some reason, so you’re the only one getting this.  Got a call from Dad around 5:15 tonight asking where I was.  Said was still  at work, leaving in about 10 minutes, is everything ok.  He said, no. He was shaken.  I said are you ok.   He said no, I  went outside to get the mail and I fell and hit my head and blood is running down my face.  I said, Dad, I’ll be there in 10 minutes.   Flew out.  Got there.  Yes, he cut his head open, but didn’t require stitches.  He was shaken by every sense of the word.  He hurt his wrist area, but not sure how much.  I packed some ice and got him settled in and his wrist on ice.  I’ll watch it the next  couple days to make sure he didn’t jam it somehow.  Just a heads up realization that our father is getting old.  When I was icing his wrist, he was literally shaking.  Not nervously, but just shaking.  He’s alone, and like anyone his age, alone, he wants to  make sure he call reach someone at any point in time and know that they are there.  I’m going to call him in a few minutes to double check on him.  I’m sure he would appreciate a phone call.    Take care, hope all is well."  

Our Dad is turning 82 in April.  There are 6 of us kids.  A brother that lives in Colorado, 3 sisters and 1 brother that live 10-20 minutes away from Dad and ME that lives 1 1/2 hrs away.  Would you Not expect at least a phone call when something like this happens....when it happened?  I mean at least then one of us could have made the choice to go be with him or call him through out the evening to check on him.  My husband doesn't see it the same way.  Of course he's an only child that lives the same distance away from his now alone Dad.

Am I over reacting here?  Just asking!


  1. Oh you do get into it here. Hmmm, if this had been my dad, I would have taken him to the ER because he could have a concussion and that would be a real problem or he may have had a TIA that caused his fall, also a problem. It is sobering to realize that a parent is getting older and may need more help than even he would like to confess. You are his daughter and as important a part of the family as anyone no matter how far you are away so, of course, you did want to know. It will be important that everyone works together nicely for the same for your precious dad. All the best with this one!

  2. I'm thinking you should have been notified that it happened.. same night. Someone should have stayed
    with him in case he became confused, etc... due to the fall and his age. Not to mention, the wrist could
    have been sprained or broken. Yes, you definitely should have been called.. or at least one of the other
    siblings. Just my opinion. Email also should have gone out to all siblings as well, regardless of their location.

  3. You are not overreacting, Lisa! I think you definitely should have gotten a phone call.

  4. He should have been take to the ER. You can't tell things from just looking at a person and I would have expected a phone call!

    Hopefully someone has taken him to his doctor or the ER to make sure he's o.k.

  5. Lisa, this is such a hard thing to deal with. I would say it depends on each family, and then on each family member. The workings of every family is different. Some are close enough that this kind of notification wouldn't even be an issue - it would just happen. Some are so disconnected, that they still wouldn't have heard about it. Whatever is going on in your family - you need to assure your sister that you want to be more involved in decisions and want to be notified. As the one who's always left to do the running in MY family, I never know when to call, and when not to. If I do call, then invariably someone says, "well, I'm going out of town this weekend, can't do anything, blah, blah, blah", but if I don't call - well you get my drift. Darned if you do, darned if you don't. Maybe I'm way off, but I'd be willing to guess if you reassure her that you want to be notified and then follow through when she does call, it might open up the communications and make the whole situation better. Hope this helps, and please don't think I'm sticking up for her - just trying to look at it from the outside. Best Wishes- hope we are all helpful to you, Sandi

  6. If I were you, I would have expected to be called. And men are so different. You just have to realize that they don't react like we do. Hope your dad is ok.

  7. I agree with all above-- you should have received a call, telling you that he'd been checked out by an ER doctor and was fine.
    I think a visit to the ER would have been necessary-- like mentioned before, you don't know what could have caused the fall, or the true nature of his injuries.
    Sounds like a family meeting is in order. So that everyone knows the protocol when it comes to dad.

    take care-- Pat


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