You know, sometimes things within families run deep! The past, is never really the past even though you try your whole lifetime to make it change. Some people, family members...sisters to be more exact, will just always have a problem with the others. It doesn't matter that they are now grown and married and have children of their own, who are also, quite possibly grown and married themselves! Certain relationships, like sisters are always a competition and sadly, there is always one who has to try and out do the others and try and make them look bad in certain situations! And more often then not....it's silly, laughable, but not always at the time it is happening! Alot of you know what I am saying, hopefully not many though. Because underneath ALL the pettiness, that you try NOT to let happen and yet, somehow you are part of it....It's sad and hurtful! Not only to you, the person that it is actually hurting, but, MORE then likely and probably more so, to the person that is doing the hurting, but refuses to acknowledge it!
This is happening right now to me and one of my sister's. The one born before me, I am the baby! There has ALWAYS been tension between us, maybe even before I was old enough to realize it! She is about 5 yrs older then I and has ALWAYS tried to make my life miserable. For years, as grown-ups we rarely contacted each other. Not because of all of the "past", but because we are grown now and have our own lives and families. That happens in some families, especially when they aren't close anyway....sadly (I'm the youngest of 6)!
Now it has come to the simple planning of our Dad's 80th birthday....and there is strife! Over something silly and ridiculous! I live the furthest away and so communicating has had to be thru email.....I know, things get misconstrued thru emails. But, this particular sister, as she so strongly pointed out to me, works a 9 hr a day job.....I am at Home (my job never ends)! She has no energy OR time to debate my issues! I asked why she changed me from doing this one thing for the party and gave it to our other sister instead (she is in-charge of it all)? She basically told me, as IF I am still her Little Sister....to Just Stop! Yet she never answered my question....never told me the reason, I had to find that out from the other sister!
I guess what I am trying to say is this.....Communicate! Alot of stress on people, especially in families between Sister's, could be avoided with Communication!
I did take the high road and apologized, even though I didn't do anything to apologize for! She, as expected, accepted my apology....but didn't offer one back! And when I pointed out to her that all she had to do was tell me why the change in plans happened....she now tells me again, to Just Stop! And asks me if all I have to do all day is complain!
How am I to respond to such childish responses from my older sister?
I responded that she has my cell and she is welcome to call on her "free time" to discuss things like a grown-up and that I love her!
Thanks for reading! I had to vent....advice welcomed if you have any!